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"Now, this is it, this is what the whole series has been leading up to: an orgy, a six-way orgy, of death and destruction!"
Jeremy Clarkson

The Grand Final of Robot Wars: The First Wars was the final six robot melee battle which decided the Grand Champion of Robot Wars: The First Wars. The Grand Final was broadcast at the end of the episode featuring Heat F of the First Wars, on 27 March 1998 on BBC Two.

Competing robots[]

Roadblock
Roadblock (winner of Heat A)
Weight 82.5kg
Dimensions 1.45m x 1.10m x 0.40m
Speed 5mph
Turning Circle 0m
Ground Clearance 10mm
Power 24V electric motors
Weapons Circular saw
From: Bodmin Community College
Team Members: Hender Blewitt, Chris Kinsey & Peter Kinsey
Recyclopse Crop
Recyclopse (winner of Heat B)
Weight 79.5kg
Dimensions 0.90m x 0.90m x 0.45m
Speed 4mph
Turning Circle 1.5m
Ground Clearance 0mm
Power 24V industrial motor
Weapons Pneumatic steel tongue-flipper
From: Mickfield, near Stowmarket
Team Members: Rex Garrod & Simon West
Robot The Bruce Crop
Robot The Bruce (winner of Heat C)
Weight 84.6kg
Dimensions 0.82m x 0.52m x 0.37m
Speed 4mph
Turning Circle 0m
Ground Clearance 50mm
Power 24V electric motor
Weapons Brute force
From: Ipswich
Team Members: George Francis & Mick Cutter
Cunning Plan Crop
Cunning Plan (winner of Heat D)
Weight 11.5kg
Dimensions 0.63m x 0.48m x 0.17m
Speed 10mph
Turning Circle 0m
Ground Clearance 10mm
Power Electric drill motors
Weapons None
From: University of Reading
Team Members: Oliver Steeples
Bodyhammer S1 Crop 2
Bodyhammer (winner of Heat E)
Weight 78.9kg
Dimensions 0.80m x 0.80m x 0.60m
Speed 9mph
Turning Circle 0m
Ground Clearance 15mm
Power 4 x 18V domestic drill motors
Weapons Hammer
From: Gloucester
Team Members: Robin Herrick, Andrew Dayton-Lovett & Steve Jones
TRACIE Crop 2
T.R.A.C.I.E. (winner of Heat F)
Weight 52.9kg
Dimensions 1.55m x 0.85m x 0.20m
Speed 10mph
Turning Circle 0m
Ground Clearance 50mm
Power 12V motor
Weapons Spikes
From: King Edward VI Grammar School
Team Members: Andrew Rockliffe, Christopher Hancomb & David Hall

Grand Final[]

Roadblock vs Recyclopse vs Robot The Bruce vs Cunning Plan vs Bodyhammer vs T.R.A.C.I.E.[]

Grand Final First

The six robots wait

"And into the final, from Heat One Roadblock, diverting all opponents to take the glory road. From Heat Two Recyclopse, with its extending tongue, licking all opponents. From Heat Three, the brute force of Robot The Bruce, and our featherweight pretender Cunning Plan, spinning to victory in Heat Four. Next, the copper-coloured coal scuttle (Bodyhammer), working out the maze in Heat Five - and they're all joined by tonight's winner the not-so ladylike T.R.A.C.I.E.!"
— Jonathan Pearce's roll call of the Grand Finalists
Recyclopse roadblock tracie

Roadblock rams the speared Recyclopse

All six robots leaped off the mark, entering into a swirling maelstrom of metal and engineering. Cunning Plan ricocheted and spun off of T.R.A.C.I.E., who in turn speared Recyclopse, and Roadblock joined the attack, slipping its wedge beneath Recyclopse. Meanwhile, Bodyhammer slammed into the minuscule Cunning Plan and shunted it around. T.R.A.C.I.E. and Recyclopse drove off to one side, away from Roadblock, but it was unclear who was dragging or pushing who. Recyclopse managed to pull away after using its extending tongue to slam T.R.A.C.I.E. into the arena wall. T.R.A.C.I.E. stayed aggressive by then spiking Bodyhammer and Roadblock simultaneously, along with Robot the Bruce pressing against Roadblock's left side, and Bodyhammer engaging on the right. The six robots all converged near T.R.A.C.I.E.'s starting position, but no one landed a successful attack on another.

Tracie Cunning Plan

T.R.A.C.I.E. comes to rest on Cunning Plan

During the fray, however, T.R.A.C.I.E. was sent into a spin following a knock from Robot The Bruce. At the same time Cunning Plan bounced off the rear of Robot The Bruce, and reversed into Roadblock. T.R.A.C.I.E. then rushed at Roadblock but drove up and onto Cunning Plan. This effectively immobilised both robots, as T.R.A.C.I.E.'s wheels were suspended off the ground, and Cunning Plan was pinned in place by T.R.A.C.I.E.'s weight.

"And T.R.A.C.I.E.'s up, on Cunning Plan! And both of them are out! Immobilised!"
— Jonathan Pearce

Now, with four remaining, Recyclopse attempted to flip Bodyhammer over with the tongue but could only nudge it forward, while Roadblock turned and grazed Bodyhammer with its saw. Recyclopse then chased after Bodyhammer, but Robot the Bruce shoved it into the path of Roadblock who had now set Recyclopse as its primary target, whilst Robot the Bruce and Bodyhammer bashed into each other. The three other robots all got beneath Recyclopse's ground clearance, but it came to rest on Roadblock's wedge.

Recyclopse roadblock

Roadblock pushes Recyclopse around

Bodyhammer and Robot the Bruce slammed together, but Roadblock was being the main offender, using its wedge to push Recyclopse around, despite its attempts to escape.

"Rex Garrod needs to get his tongue back in, in every sense of the word!"
— Jonathan Pearce as Recyclopse fires its tongue desperately
Robot the bruce roadblock

Robot the Bruce on its side

All of a sudden, it became clear that Recyclopse's drive chain had fallen off due to Roadblock's constant pressure, and it was now immobile. Roadblock scooped Bodyhammer aside, and drove under the oncoming Robot the Bruce, achieving immediately what Cruella and Wedgehog had failed to do - tipped the box on its side. This left only two robots left, and Roadblock charged at Bodyhammer, who scuttled away. Roadblock wedged beneath it and pushed it around, before cease was called.

"It's over, it goes to the judges! And the arena on its feet, a standing ovation!"
— Jonathan Pearce
Roadblock bodyhammer

Roadblock pursues Bodyhammer

Roadblock champions

Roadblock are crowned champions

Roadblock was announced as the First Wars Grand Champion, on a judges decision, the first of seven Grand Finals to be settled that way.

"The judges take their time coming to their momentous decision. Who is to be the champion? The whole arena and the teams in the pits await the verdict with bated breath. It's the Roadblock team of Hender Blewett, Peter Kinsey and Chris Kinsey from Bodmin Community College! Well done, lads!"
— Craig Charles sums up the judges' decision in The First Great War

First Wars Grand Champion: Roadblock

Trivia[]

  • The Grand Final of Series 1 was the only one to feature a non-heavyweight robot.
  • Of the six competitors, four of them would make repeat Grand Final appearances in future - Roadblock, Team Cassius, Team Chaos and Cold Fusion Team.
  • The Grand Final was one of only two UK battles to whittle down from six competitors to only two - the other being the Middleweight Melee of Extreme 1.
  • This battle was the only one in history not to feature any House Robots. (The Snooker trial in Heat F was the only side event not to involve any House Robots either).
  • Of the six competitors, only two featured a moving weapon (Recyclopse and Roadblock, with Bodyhammer still using its spike rather than the hammer). Neither used their respective weapons once during the battle.
  • T.R.A.C.I.E. became the first robot to retire after a Grand Final and not return to Robot Wars.

Navigation[]

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